Dear Internet,

I’m saying ‘see you later’ for a year. I’m going to get some well needed help at a facility called Teen Challenge which is located just West of London, Ontario.

—12 Months.—

Someone asked me if I thought I was as needy as some of the other men who need rehabilitation; and the truth is, I might not be. But everyone’s struggles lead deeper and deeper down a path, and because I am aware of this, I will be changing my direction sooner than later, before it’s too late to have the clarity to make the wise choice.

God is good, God is love. He is the preserver and the provider of my faith.

Jesus is the good shepherd, and I shall not be in want. He has provided a place for rest. He has led me to still waters where I can replenish my thirst for Him, and He will restore my soul. He has led me all my life on His path, in His name. Even though I’ve strayed so far from Him, and even unto the shadow of death, I fear no evil because my God is with me. His rod and staff, they have comforted me. Jesus has prepared a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; He has anointed my head with oil and my cup overflows. Goodness, Mercy, Faithfulness, and the Fruits of the Holy Spirit dwell in me and shall follow me all of the days that are left in my earthly life. And I will be with God forever in eternity, in His majestic Heaven.

So, please don’t miss me, my friend, Internet. I will be back a strong man, ready to live well, love well, laugh and be free from my baggage. Hallelujah!

If y’all have questions about my circumstances, just throw me an email:

— “lucas.michael.roberts@gmail.com” —

Changes

My Daily Vibe has been an ongoing blog of mine since the summer of 2010. It feels like just yesterday that Tumblr was even introduced to the world wide web. Then again, I’ve seen Facebook change multiple times, from those days of no apps and limited photo uploads to now; where video calling is made possible with the co-operation of Skype and Facebook. Technology has increased in speed and user friendliness in the past 10 years quicker than ever before. If you remember the original Motorola cellular phones, a brick was considered at par with the best technology available to the businessman. Or take the commodore 64; I used to type in the code in order to play 64 bit “Frantic Freddy”. Or the ColecoVision, with its number pad/joystick controller.

Last summer, available to me was a Playstation 3 connected to two MacBooks, three Dell PC’s, and an Xbox 360 via a home server product by Microsoft. I was able to play any file from any system on any system with the very capable WIFI that was set up. Genius.

So, social media has increased as well, obviously. I currently have 1,014 friends on Facebook. In 1998, I had 6 close friends that I called on the telephone and made plans to play games with them in the yard, our basement or at their house. I used my imagination to create grandiose adventures with my brother on our acre of property. I looked forward to summer, not so I could blog weekly about what I’ve done, but so I could wear no shirt and ride my bike up and down the dirt road that was my home, so I could catch frogs in the ditch and show them to my dad.

Stop

Once upon a lonely time, melancholy filled the room. The rose of the cigarette was hidden beneath 4 minutes of stillness, and still the ash had not fallen. His office chair tilted back as his feel hang off the laundry basket, a broken social life lay before him, signed in to every account known with still no human communication. A song plays in the background. Picture a mountainous region off the shore of the Mediterranean Sea - laying in a hammock in your front yard, watching the sail boats collide with the horizon. His mind drifts away to this place, and he seems hopeful.
He wakes from trance and begins to look at the mirror. He sees his eyes, blazing with golden blue; and the black of his pupil is a bottomless pit of creativity. When he writes, it becomes apparent that it’s a gift. His humble mother calls him to come downstairs and his mind races with ideas. is she angry? is she mad? is she lonely? does she need someone to talk to?
He walks downstairs to see his mother sitting emotionless on the tweed chesterfield, her high heels shine and her pearls glisten as a small tear runs down her face. She wipes it with a serviette, and she anxiously touches her wool skirt. He locks eyes with her, she sees the golden blue from her memory.
When she birthed him, he was suffocating and near death. A blue soul was born. Weeks later, he was a bright, healthy baby.
They were silent for a moment and then he spoke, “is everything alright?”. She began to cry; “yes, everything will be fine. There are really tough times in life, and this is one. We will get through it. But we need you now. We need our family. Are you okay, son?”. He was silent for another moment. He looked at her with look of certainty and a broken heart: “yes. Everything is fine mom. You know you can call me whenever you need me.” “I know, son, I love you. Do you have everything ready? Camera, computer, chargers?” He double checked his pockets and opened his suitcase. A bottle of whiskey, a bottle of wine, a guitar tuner, an umbrella, a glasses case, some dress shirts and socks. “Yes, I’m ready to go” he said as he locked the luggage. “Thank you mom, you’ve been more than gracious, I love you. Goodbye.” “Goodbye, my son, I love you forever and always.”
He ran to the bus stop in the rain, forsaking his umbrella to fully feel the catharsis.

Tutor

I recently started to work for a company called Turning Point Tutoring. My days consist of planing for educational trips, writing a blog, updating a website and tutoring kids via the internet using Microsoft Lync.

Microsoft Lync is a voice/video conferencing program with a whiteboard. This is really useful because the whiteboard acts like a desk, shared between all the participants. If the student is reading Romeo and Juliet, the tutor can put questions on the whiteboard and the student can answer them. It’s interactive. It’s relationship. It’s tutoring.

Some of the students live in Beijing, China (or close to) and that adds another neat dynamic to the experience. I have two students right now, they are 10-12 years old. Really smart kids.

The educational trips are a huge bonus. My boss is taking me and some others to Montreal this weekend to research McGill and to experience some art and culture. We’re going to see my boss’s daughter dance in a recital with Mosaica. I wrote a blog about that too (here).

Check out the blog, check out your groceries, check out my blog.

      Lucas M R

Quick Time Procedures

Life is too fast. It’s like running after a train while it moves faster and faster away from the terminal. It’s like the moment that the father’s fingertips leave his child’s bike seat. Time is stopped and I am sure there is a lot going on in the fathers mind. Where is my child going to go? Where will he fall? When will he look back? When will he thank me? When will he remember the good times more than the bad? When will he finally be able to jump on the bike and ride away without falling? Is this the time?

Summer Time Coffee Stop

A man.

Sitting in a café/bar, he stretches one long leg over the other creating a comfortable position for reading a book, “Lords of Finance”. He, alone, rests his parched body, sipping on small glasses of water that come often, delivered by the friendly wait staff. His slicked hair tops his freshly shaven face, it is four o’clock and his shadow is at high noon. His goatee is thick, but clean. He concentrates so boldly on the text, his eyebrows fierce with some sort of enjoyment. He wears a thin necklace with a grand charm on it in the shape of a star.

The dark bronze blends in to his thick chest hair, you can tell that he is well groomed. He wears a black dress shirt, with the top three buttons undone to show his jewelry. He has these eyes; they are piercing blue, light blue like a Jewish boy. His fitted jeans touch the perfect part of his ankle, again showing the maturity in his wardrobe.

Although his style is somewhat sophisticated, he is smart. He wears loafers that are probably very comfortable. They look thick. His workers hands show signs of oppression; he likely worked in a skilled trade, and is now re-thinking his career, reading “Lords of Finance” as homework for his aristocratic day job.

He orders a Vietnamese coffee, inquiring about what it is before he orders it. His eyebrows rise with curiosity, and he nods his head kindly. Five minutes later, the waitress approaches with the café steaming on a large plate. The latte at the bottom of the mug is white, and the creamy-caramel coffee floats above. She tells him to stir is, and he affirms the order, “I’m supposed to stir it?” he says with a smile on his face.

After a few moments of wait, he stirs the drink and tastes it. Within a minute, he is back at his book with a satisfied smile on his face: the mug sits emptied on the table. Across from him, he has rested his trench coat over the opposite chair. It is beige in color, the typical businessman’s coat. He obviously put it there so that he seems less lonely. A break from the text is taken, and he stares at the sugar on the table.

In his eyes, he is afraid. I imagine that he has just been through a divorce, and his wife challenged him to “get a life!” Now, he is reading his book at a half abandoned, Queen Street West café, drinking stimulants to keep his wary mind awake.

Soon, he will suffer from an accident due to the over bearing stress of divorce. I feel a sort of empathy with him. He is scared. I’ve been scared. I pray for him. Fear is not worth the depressing thoughts of a divorcee. In his stimulated state, he is safe.

Society

A Thought

By Lucas Michael Roberts Re: sociological perspective

Ever wonder where ideas come from? I often hear people talking about individuals of other races, genders, sexual orientation, or other defining aspects of some ones life in a negative, they are weird, kind of way. In a moment or two, our sociological perspective can change, and we might not even know it. Many a times I have wondered at the shy, timid kid in the hall ways, or the out going, middle-age man, or the wandering homeless on the streets of Hamilton, or the Gypsy in the streets of Paris. What are they thinking? Are they conscious of their emotional and sociological perspective? Do they think of me; the white, middle-class, Canadian small town boy?
There are some major sociological theories that look at issues from different sociological perspectives: often these theories have very different outcomes. I look at the structural-functioning theory. I understand this theory as a factory of inter-related machines (individuals and institutions) that work together to create a society. That society then works within a larger culture to mould countries together with governing powers that communicate, allowing the world to become one functioning structure. This system works well, as long as all the parts, both micro and macro, are stable and orderly.
Second we have the social-conflict perspective. This one focuses more on the inequality of society and its conflicts and changes throughout history and into the future. I see the world as constantly changing, but I would find it hard to believe that there will never be a certain peace, and that, as the conflict theorists believe, there will always be conflict amidst varying cultures as they work together and against each other.
Social dysfunction is a large part of this perspective and society is filled with items that disrupt the intended goal. On the bright side, I understand that conflict will always arise, and in the eyes of conflict theorists, the goal is to use anti-oppressive practices in order to limit those stigmatisms that have a tight hold on marginalized individuals. Du Boise was a major contributor to the idea of the social-conflict theory and made considerable headway with anti-racist society.
Thirdly, we see Symbolic-interaction. This theory is based on all the interactions of individuals within a society on a day-to-day basis. Max Weber is one of the man founders of this approach. For me, I think I would be a symbolic interactionist. I am constantly thinking about my interactions with others, and whenever I have the chance, I watch individuals interact. It’s a game I play with life.
Just a thought,

Lucas Michael Roberts

30% Off!

I don’t care who they are, they need to up their game.

Today I was asked to write a review on a policy surrounding the 30% off tuition fees in Ontario. The report I read was actually published by a lobbying group called the Canadian Federation of Students. This so-called Briefing Note was one sided supported by only minimal research and statistical data collection and therefore should be considered a pity cry for the economically stupid students.

“While the grant will help many students, it adds further complications to an already complex financial aid system and fails to help students who need it the most.”

The briefing note then sets out a number of “Exclustions”, of reasons why students would not be eligible for the grant. This is ridiculous.
“According to the Ontario Student Assistance Program, students are considered
dependent if…” and the list goes on.

Let’s step back for a moment, please, and review what it is to be a community worker. As you’re career grows, you work for larger and larger centres that soon turn into corporations that soon turn into NGO’s that soon turn into government positions of authority and policy making. So, from this long succession of success and power of the one who has written this policy in the first place, has obvious intentions within the government of Ontario and has presumably had plenty of meetings concerning this policy with important people with money. These days, Canada is only worried about getting our strong nation higher up in the World Market. We should, as part of humanity, want to help our country become something that is worth remembering and teaching about. Society is constantly on the move, so why should we give money to those individuals who are not dedicated to moving forward and advancing their COLLEGE and UNDERGRADUATE DIPLOMAS and DEGREES and therefore ARE eligible.

And it’s interesting that my conclusion and the CFS’ conclusion are the same.

Some examples:

“Exclusion Two
Students in Second Entry Programs
Second-entry programs like teacher’s college, law, medicine, physiotherapy and dentistry are taken after students have completed a program and have often already accumulated significant student debt.”

My response:

Second-entry study programs are meant for those who excel in their field and therefore private scholarships and grants, being part of a capitalistic government, will, in a competitive market, put out applications for those dedicated enough to spend the time and energy applying to these scholarships. That makes sense.

“Exclusion 3
Graduate students
Graduate students in Ontario
pay the highest tuition fees in
Canada and have less access to
financial aid than undergraduate
students.”

My response:

Again, like above, Graduate students are in upper level studying, it is a competitive market for success driven individuals working their way up with all the same struggle, just making the right choices and working the hours and filling out the paper work and accumulating debt that will make the cut for these Canadian Government jobs that are oh so precious.

“Exclusion 6:
International students:
International students in Ontario
pay two to three times the amount
of tuition fees that domestic
students pay for the same
education.”

This is pure politics. There ought to be a reason why almost half my friends at York university pay upwards of $20, 000 a year. It does not bother them. Our education system is one of the best in the world and should be sought after by students world wide. I have a friend who’s government pays for his schooling abroad in Canada because of the QUALITY of education we provide. There is a cost to that, there is a high cost. It is worth it.

I guess my point is, for times sake, this article could have been better. Any writer worker in a lobby group should do much more research in order to make his point more clear. His points are very good, and what OSAP is doing is not a great choice for National academic growth, but this Brief was amateur and single sided, one track minded.

Tip: When writing for a lobby group, look at all aspects of the government as it is presented, as a beaurocrazy, and acknowledge the truth that it is all controlled by a select population of capitalist, power-hungry, people friendly, masquerade ball attendees.